i realize my new year's resolution 2010 is also around 10 days late..lol....

but here's my resolution of 2010.. so let's see how well i kept up with them last year..

1. to live for HIM everyday 

--> i tried... still room for improvement tho

2. to train for higher EQ

--> actually i think my EQs higher now... so i guess... i did kept this resolution

3. to swear less (esp in chinese... lol)

--> hm.... i think i swore using less words.. but the amount.. maybe only a TINY improvment.. or none at all...==

4. to re-access my priorities... dance is not my profession..

-->i do think i danced a lot less this year.. maybe coz i wasn't as involved in danso as before.... but i guess its about quality not quantity~~

5. to learn to appreciate more n criticize less

--> once in a while.. i'll think of what i already hv.. and stop focusing on the small things that i don't hv.. but most times.. i still do complain about the small things i don't hv... i guess this is a life long lesson to learn...

6. to PASS MB AND OSCE (ie no need to take any supple/ viva...).. ultimate goal is to stay in class of 2012.. =="

--> i did pass MB... and eventually OSCE.. so i m STILL in class 2012!! woohoo~~

7. to loose some weight.. erm well at least not gain any.. hahhaa

--> i think i'm more or less same weight as last year... so still alright.. lol

8. to learn how to concentrate for longer

--> i really did learn... 3rd year MB had totally trained up my concentration skills... hving to study so much in so little time...

9. to spend more time with family

--> since i don't really dance on weekends anymore... i really did spend more time with family... n i actually do enjoy those times~~

10. to learn how to love

--> yet another life long lesson..... n i guess this cannot be judged by me.. so my frds.. do u think i luv u this year?

so just from a glance.. seems like i did pretty gd in 2010... kinda stuck to my resolutions.. so here's finally..

my new year's resolution 2011

1. Pass Med4, stay in med2012!!!

2. try to see as much as i can in Africa, learn as much as i can as its unlikely i'll ever go back there again

3. dance my ass off in LA, be like a sponge n soak every thing up in those short 3 weeks

4. Be more thankful of the things i already hv. learn to appreciate 

5. Have better management of my finances.. i really think i spend money without ever planning... ==

6. Try to be more healthy... (fainted twice in 2010.. and nearly fainted quite a few times as well...==).. maybe start off with hving breakfast... lol

7. learn how to freestyle.. its sth that i always wanted to be able to do.. 

8. Learn to be humble.

9. faith with my walk with the lord

10. remind ppl... that i m actually a GIRL!!!!!!

so yup.. here's my 10 for 2011... lets review it 1 year later~~~

don't plan to tag anyone this year...

just whoever read this.. plz help me stick to my resolutions this year~~

chose to type this here coz facebook is getting too scary....

been thinking about my life so far lately.... and there's just something i really wanna say...

i've been in a lot different circle of friends...

DGJS circle, DGS circle, DBGS music circle, APA music circle

Sydney high school frd circle, sydney's uni frd circle, sydney's music circle, sydney's church circle, sydney's dance circle

CU med school circle, HK church circle

and

HK dance circle..... and this hv definitely won the prize of being "the most toxic circle"

4 ppl deleted me as their fb friends... all 4 of them r from the hk dance circle

i've made more ppl mad at me in this circle than all the others combined

maybe its just coz i'm not suitable in this circle

or

there r simply too much drama in this circle

ppl hating each other, ppl attacking each other

criticizing (both healthy and non-healthy ones), gossiping (both true and not true)

no one is willing to accept others...

but to just live in their own clique and criticize anyone who is slightly different from themselves

this clique thing is even worse than high school..... is it coz the ppl in this circle are a lot less mature than the ppl i met in other circles? not sure.... but the truth is everyone is too stubborn

with no respect for one another

i m not saying EVERYONE i met in this circle is like this

i did meet a few life-long worth friends, which i treasure deeply

but

some ppl i thought i could be frds with

ended up in another clique

and that's the end of our so called friendship

there's just too much toxic air here

i want out

just saw the graduation photos of a frd who studied in UK.... it sorta triggered out a whole lot of thinkings n reminiscing...

i know there is no point looking backwards n keep asking "what if"s.. but i simply can't stop wondering.. what will happen if i had chose to stay in sydney to continue my uni degree? what kind of person will i be now.. will i be happier? or will i be even more of a bitch than i m now.. will i hv a bf? will i still be drinking everyday? (lol) will i still be into music? will i not be so into dance?......

i admit that i've changed a lot in the past 3 years.. ever since i left sydney.. got a lot of reality hit.. a lot of awakenings.. my personality hv changed i'm pretty certain.. my EQ is higher now (but still not high enough).. toned down a bit of my noisy-ness.. (ok i m still loud now but like.. LESS loud).. i mean.. growing up in DGS.. n then living in sydney.. kinda made me hard to communicate with the local HKers.. so i guess these 3 years hv "localized" me in some way.. there is less "cultural shock" now (i hope)... 

and med school does change a person a lot... forced to be more mature.. forced to face extreme stress.. and mostly.. forced to be hardworking... i think i would hv NEVER imagined i can be this hardworking..... ok i m still one of the laziest in med school... but like.. i'm srsly SO MUCH MORE hardworking.. i've studied more in my yr3 than my whole life put together.. so i couldn't help but wonder... how much more would i hv enjoyed my uni life if i hvn't chosen med in HK....

and like studying abroad was my dream since i was a lil girl... i don't even know y i wanted to so much.. but i just rmb one english lesson back when i was still in P.3.. the teacher listed out a lot of life goals.. n told us to pick 10 n rank them according to which ones u think r most important... i put studying abroad as one of the top5s.. out of the whole class.. only 3 or 4 ppl picked that as their top 10.. well i finally got the chance to study abroad in F.5... i lived in sydney for ard 3 years.. its like about the length of a degree.. but.... i think part of me still fantasize studying uni abroad... not to lie.. but i do think my personality would hv suited uni in syd or uk or us or whatever.. more that it suited hk..

well i know a lot of gd stuff that happened to me these few years won't happen if i don't study in hk... eg danso really hv exposed me to a lot of stage n performance experiences... but to be honest.. after i graduate.. i don't even know if i wanna stay in this city anymore... but it'll be hard for me to work somewhere else if i got my doctor license here.. plus all of my family lives here... sigh i dunno... but i'm jsut kinda sick of this city.. i wanna go somewhere else

ok enough rambling.. back to study

i bet no one even reads xanga anymore LOL (thats kinda y i chose to type it here n not fb..)

luv this lil passage.. got it from tree

Life is too short to wake up in the morning with regrets.

So, love the people who treat you right

and forget about the ones who don't.

And believe

that everything happens for a reason...

if you get a chance - take it;

if it changes your life - let it.

Nobody said that it would be easy

They just promised

it would be worth it.

dastar's 1st anniversary!!

DASTAR IS 1 YR OLD!!!

i REALLY luv each n every one of u!!!!

still rmb last yr i was trying to get together a crew... n don't even know how.. we 5 got together...

thx for giving me a crew where i truly belong, and belonging to each and everyone of us

thx for giving me a chance to choreograph (altho i still suck at it..==)

thx for all the competitions, performances

thx for all the money we got out of them (lol)

thx for all the late nights thx for all the laughter

and most importantly

thx for giving me a place where i can just be who i m.. a true bitch

XDXDXDXD

i don't hv to hold back.. i don't hv to care about stupid dramas

i can just be me and i will know u all will understand... ^^

altho we can't compete in full crew this year (tsk tsk judy choi)

but i do hope we can keep dancing, or simply just hanging out together in the days to come!!

MUAHZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ